I've carried hatred toward a couple of people in my life, if I'm honest. It didn't feel like a choice at the time — it felt like a fair response to what they'd done. It took me a long time to actually look at what the Bible says about hate, because I think I avoided it on purpose. I didn't want to be told to let it go yet.
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What Does the Bible Say About Hate? The Short Answer
The Bible directly confronts hatred toward people as spiritually serious, while distinguishing it from hating evil itself, which Scripture treats as appropriate.
1 John 4:20 doesn't soften the language: "Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar." That's strong wording on purpose. Hatred toward people isn't treated in Scripture as a minor emotional slip — it's described as fundamentally incompatible with genuinely loving God. At the same time, Psalm 97:10 says "let those who love the Lord hate evil," so the target of hatred matters. Hate sin and injustice. Don't hate people.
Hatred Toward People vs. Hatred of Evil
Scripture consistently separates hating evil, which it commands, from hating people, which it condemns — the object of the hatred determines whether it aligns with God's heart or opposes it.
Romans 12:9 says, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good." That's a command to hate — but aimed squarely at evil itself, not at the people who do it. Amos 5:15 says "hate evil, love good." This distinction matters because it's easy to blur the line between despising what someone did and despising who they are. Scripture asks for the first without the second, which is genuinely hard, but it's the standard it sets.
Jesus's Radical Command to Love Your Enemies
Jesus directly confronts the natural human instinct to hate enemies, replacing it with a command to love and pray for them — one of the most countercultural teachings in the New Testament.
Matthew 5:43-44 says, "You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." This wasn't a soft suggestion for an easier era. Jesus said this in a context of real political and personal oppression. He wasn't asking people to love enemies who'd never actually hurt them — He was asking it of people under genuine threat.
I don't think Jesus is asking us to pretend we weren't hurt, or that what happened was fine. He's asking for something much harder: choosing love as an act of obedience even when hatred would feel completely justified.
Why Hatred Is So Spiritually Dangerous, According to Scripture
The Bible warns that hatred corrodes the person who carries it as much as it targets the one it's aimed at, often described as a kind of spiritual darkness that distorts how a person sees everything else.
1 John 2:11 says, "whoever hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness; they do not know where they are going." That's a striking image — hatred described not just as wrong, but as something that disorients you, that makes you lose your way without realizing it. I've felt that. Hatred I carried didn't just affect the person I was angry at. It changed how I saw everything and everyone else, too.
How to Actually Let Go of Hatred You're Carrying
Letting go of hatred isn't usually instant — Scripture points toward praying for the person, leaving justice in God's hands, and a process of forgiveness that takes real time, not a single decision made through willpower alone.
Romans 12:19 says, "Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath." That verse gave me real relief once I understood it correctly — it's not telling you the wrong didn't matter. It's telling you that you don't have to be the one who settles the score. That's not your job, and trying to carry it usually just feeds the hatred further.
Matthew 5:44's command to pray for those who hurt you isn't about pretending everything's fine. Practically, it starts small — even praying "God, change my heart toward this person" when you can't yet pray anything kinder than that. The feeling doesn't always come first. Sometimes the obedience comes first, and the feeling follows slowly behind it.
If You're Still in the Middle of This Struggle
If you're still struggling with hatred toward someone who hurt you, that's not a disqualifying spiritual failure — it's an honest place to bring to God, who can handle the rawness of what you're actually feeling.
If you're reading this still genuinely hating someone, I'm not going to pretend that flips off because you read an article. Bring it to God exactly as honest and ugly as it actually is. He's not scared off by your anger. What He wants is for you to keep bringing it to Him instead of letting it harden into something that quietly reshapes who you are.
